It was still a loss and if you're anything like me, if the people around me are crying, I'll probably start crying myself.

aww well i was just really sad, i think i do that i geuss :S

you don't seam like a stranger to me..at least not as a complete stranger.
true,some things just don't come.but if you care anough for them,you can make them come,you can do anything if you really have a good reason.so the real question to ask yourself is - is it worth it? people are afraid of all the energy they will lose if they try and fail,give and get nothing in return but if you don't give you can't get

i advice you to follow yourself and forget how much it matters to the world,be self confident cause that is who you are and as long as you are yourself,you are not the problem,they are.and if they are the problem,then what makes them worthy of you? be who you are and the ones you care for will love you for who you are.

and be patient,don't give up.if you feel you lack the energy to keep up,remmember,time is long,everything will sort out,we allways seam to laugh ourselves looking at the times when we were 'young and stupid'. it isn't really a reputation to follow and i think it doesn't really matter who we were and who we seam to be but what we are,what we want to become and if we try hard,we'll be very happy for ourselves.there is no past nor future,only now,future is what we'll create and past is what present becomes. if we do well both will be just beatyfull.and if we do wrong,we need to try harder but never give up

i think this made me understand better those japanese anime ugly duck to beatyfull princess transformations.or just check out clark kent,his glasses and clumsiness and all..and super human power lol maybe a dumb comparicement but in smalvile,even he made many mistakes and after he saw the future and everyone looking him as a king of the universe or something,he didn't knew how to live up to the legend he will become. but if he given up fighting for what he cares about,all would be terribly lost.and not just fiction,even in life,if you give up defending you'll take the beat,if you give up from life you're gonna lose it,whatever you give up is what you will lose.

you can say,you can't lose what you never had but even as a baby we never had anything but it was fighting to survive in this new world what made us this big. and i guess if we don't fight for what we want we're gonna lose it and what we want is part of our future and we decide what will it be.

sorry for getting too deep,i tend to do it sometimes : D i think i will make this my signature... yeah,i know,i'm just trying to cheer you up.there is something i care about and am fighting for,my dreams are my life,if they aren't real i'm not real. my efforts may feel crazy but i just don't have a slightest intention of letting everything die.. there is really soo much to tell about why and it is too much to put it here,i can send you a note if you want... just too much..